17 Questions To Determine If You Truly Love Yourself

17 Questions To Determine If You Truly Love Yourself

I thought I loved myself

After decades of self-loathing, the constant self-criticism had stopped. Every once in awhile, I’d hear a voice in my head telling me, “You are beautiful”.

Then one day, my boyfriend told me he no longer loved me. I had tolerated his lack of initiative far longer than I should have, and I had given more to the relationship than I was receiving.

When you don’t love yourself enough

This break up shook me to the core. I had a to clear a lot of pain.   Suddenly, those old feelings of not being lovable came back in full force.

In releasing my pain, I began to ask myself these questions:

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From Feeling Unloved to Hugged

From Feeling Unloved to Hugged

I have a client whose mother died when she was still a baby, and her dad remarried a woman who constantly berated her and made her feel unlovable. Her father was distant and never filled the void and abandonment that she felt after losing her mother. Consequently, she has struggled all her life with feeling unlovable, and desperately craved affection. Whenever I talked with her, her pattern was to criticize herself.

From Feeling Unloved to Hugged

We were working together to release subconscious barriers that made her feel unloved when she suddenly felt

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The Power of Releasing the Heart Wall with the Emotion Code

The Power of Releasing the Heart Wall with the Emotion Code

I had a client who had been single for almost 4 yrs., and never had been married. She really wanted to have a family, and felt like her clock was ticking.   She asked me to check if she had a heart wall, and we discovered

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3 Steps to Become Open Hearted

3 Steps to Become Open Hearted

For most of my life, I was seen as indifferent, cold or standoffish.  I always admired people who could be loving and open hearted the moment we met. But I never felt comfortable letting down my guard with people that quickly.   I wondered, how could they trust someone so quickly?  How could these people be so  sure that they wouldn’t get hurt?

In those darker moments, I spent a lot of time in blame mode.   I blamed my farther for his constant criticism, for making me feel never enough. I blamed my mother for her inability to defend me against his attacks or stand up to him. I labeled my dad as an angeraholic, and my mom as a victim, and I was so stuck in these thought patterns that I couldn’t change my relationship with them.

I’ve come a long way since then. Now when I think of my parents, I no longer harbor any of the long-standing resentment or blame. When I think of my friends, or people I’ve met, I can approach them with an open heart. Without any conscious intention of doing something differently, I’m smiling more, I’m happier to see people and I’m noticing more love coming my way as well!

So what have I done to become more open hearted?

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5 Subconscious Barriers to Emotional Intimacy

5 Subconscious Barriers to Emotional Intimacy

For most of my life, I’ve feared emotional intimacy.   As I’ve grown aware that I’ve been unconsciously pushing people away, I’ve been on a mission to find and develop deeper and more meaningful relationships.   In my search, I found these 5 barriers that often hinder emotional intimacy. If you struggle with having or keeping meaningful relationships, where it feels safe to be authentic and vulnerable, see if any of these apply to you:

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How to Have a Better Relationship

How to Have a Better Relationship

My client Rachel came to me consumed by anger with her ex. She said that he just knew how to get under her skin. She felt like he could reach from the depths of her soul and tear her heart out.   She had believed that he was her soul mate. But she couldn’t get over the story that severed their relationship years ago:  when she had felt like he had purposely tried to undermine her career.

When couples don’t get along

When clients come to me because a relationship isn’t working, sometimes they are full of blame. Other times, they feel guilty because they get angry and frustrated too easily, and they end up regretting their actions.   Sometimes they aren’t clear on why they aren’t getting along, but they know that they still want to try to find a way to have a better relationship with their partner.

Why can’t we just get along?

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