How to Get From Conflict to Understanding

How to Get From Conflict to Understanding

When we get frustrated with others, we can get mired in our stories and locked into repeating patterns of behavior. It’s easy to get stuck in the blaming game.

I went to a workshop with dementia care expert, Teepa Snow, this week. She gave a perfect example of why so many of us can get stuck in frustration mode with members of our family.

The biggest mistake we make in relationships is this:

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Is it Really “Common Sense”?

Is it Really “Common Sense”?

When I hear the phrase “It’s just common sense”, I cringe.

Why?   Because our version of “common sense” is based on our environment and past experiences.   What might be common sense to an American, can be very different than what is considered common sense to someone born in a different culture.

Case in point:

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One Mindset Shift that Will Help You Forgive

One Mindset Shift that Will Help You Forgive

I spent most of my life hating my father. When growing up, he constantly criticized us or lectured us about how or who we should be.   Because he had so much anger, and insisted that we were responsible for not making him angry, I felt like I was constantly walking on eggshells.   I never felt like I could be myself. The constant striving to please him to avoid his anger was exhausting!

I remember being told more than once as a young adult that I needed to forgive him. That just deepened my despair, because I just couldn’t figure out how.   So much of his criticism left me feeling anxious, unlovable and unacceptable, and I blamed him for his role in making me feel that way.

I remember the day when my perspective shifted.

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